Day 26-28/194

Friday, Week 4!
Well, Friday has always been the best day of the work week but when you know your boyfriend is coming home for the weekend from the CHP Academy, it suddenly becomes even better! Kev's Friday started out with PT as usual. He says there are a lot of rules in the gym, and no weapons or pepper spray are allowed because it is a 'sterile' environment. On Friday morning, Kev said one of the cadets ran over to the gym to line up with the others before running in together when the cadet noticed he still had his pepper spray on him. He was about to run back to drop it off in his quad but apparently the other cadets didn't want to wait for him and told him to own up to his mistake inside. Kev said that the class as a whole was already considered late, so waiting for him to run back wouldn't have made it much worse. However, I guess that early in the morning isn't the time of day to look for compassion from your peers. Kev said the cadet went into the gym and was immediately chewed up by a staff officer in front of the class for having the pepper spray on him, was blue carded, and has to write a 2 page memo. Kev described the tedious task of memo writing to me this weekend, so as simple as a 2 page memo sounds, it isn't. I was easily convinced that it is very time consuming - specific border requirements, writing templates, and zero leniency for mistakes. After telling me the PT story, Kev said "And guess who it was?" He told me it was 'No Shoes'. We were both so happy that he pushed through the last gym incident with the shoes, and now the poor kid brought attention to himself in PT again. Hopefully he can pull it together and doesn't give up.

That's about all I got out of Kev about Friday. He says having all of his gear has been great, but it is heavy and a lot of work. Kev said some cadets even have bruises on their sides from the baton or holster sitting on their hips. Other than that, there is a lot of class work and the material is getting more challenging. He said the days are definitely getting longer and harder as the Academy attempts to teach you as much as humanly possible in six months.

He left the academy around 5 PM on Friday and was home around 6:30 :) I love opening the door to see him standing there with his bags. My heart always skips a beat!

Saturday & Sunday!
We stayed in on Friday night to catch up, watch a movie and lounge. Last weekend, we decided we wanted to start setting our alarm too so that we don''t sleep in so late and waste the day. So, we set our alarm for around 8:30 AM, had breakfast, did all Kev's laundry, and decided to go hiking at Muir Woods for the day since neither of us have ever been. We drove out to Muir Woods, but didn't get there until about 2 PM. We should have done more research because after about an hour and a half drive, we couldn't find a parking spot anywhere. We gave a pretty good effort but after a few laps, we called it a day and headed home. To be honest, we didn't really care. We were both just happy to have a little road trip together even if the destination didn't work out. When we got home, we went to Staples and Michaels for a few random academy needs and then went to a birthday dinner for one of Kev's close friends. It was the first time we went out with friends all month!

Kev has a tough test on Tuesday that apparently directly correlates to attrition at the academy, so we treated ourselves to early mani/pedis and spent the rest of Sunday studying. Yes, Kev got a mani and a pedi and loved it almost as much as he needed it! ;) Kev studied his material while I helped him make a set of flash cards to study tomorrow and eventually again when he is tested on it later in the academy for a midterm type test. Apparently, the best time for flashcards is when Kev has a few minutes to do 'paperwork' and he takes the cards to the stall with him. Lately, I've been less excited about touching old flashcards to quiz him on! The test on Tuesday is about amendments, when a crime was committed and when you can legally arrest someone. We usually buzz him on Saturday, but since we had the dinner, we buzzed his hair Sunday.We relaxed the rest of the night and Kev headed back to the academy around 8:30 PM. It doesn't get easier to watch him leave, but he told me that every time he leaves we are closer to graduation. Well, we are officially 1 of 6 months down!

Another surprise note Kev left in my room before going back to the Academy <3

- Mimi

Day 25/194

Thursday, Week 4! 

Yes, he got his gun!
Kev didn't even call me when he was back to his quad for the night, but instead he text me a picture he had his roommate take of him in his cadet uniform, shiny boots, belt with shiny buttons, vest... and a gun! Strapped to the right side of the most handsome cadet in the academy was a gun! We finally jumped on the phone and he told me all about his day.

He woke up in the morning and went to class, where he said an officer brought in boxes of guns to distribute to the class. He also received three magazines, a holster and pepper spray. Kev said they were given a gun safety lesson, advised that the gun better stay on academy grounds, and they officially get to wear it with their vests every day now. After the cadets felt on top of the world by receiving the last of the tools to keep on their belt, the mayhem started. Kev said this was the worst part of the day. When everyone left the classroom with their new gear, they walked out single file to head to the chow hall but instead saw every staff officer lined up in the quad. The cadets got chewed up! Kev said he got nervous as he walked by them, he was looked up and down but his brass and uniform were perfect, then he was asked who the Commissioner was. Kev knew exactly who the Commissioner was but was so uncomfortable with a staff officer yelling at him inches from his face. He answered in confidence and the officer yelled back, "Are you sure!" Kev said, "Sir, yes, sir!" He was wrong!!! He knew the answer and has been studying like crazy, but with all the chaos around him he said the wrong name. He was yelled at to write a blue card for not knowing his knowledge questions. He wrote exactly that, handed it over and was chewed up again for not being specific enough and said they compared it to writing a ticket for a DUI without any detail. So, he was forced to write another blue card for writing an incorrect form. He said he was shaking from all the yelling and now these blue cards mean no liberty next Wednesday. He wants to receive as few blue cards as possible because it ties in to your ranking at the academy. However, he has only received 4 blue cards total in his first month and is doing great on all his tests. Anyhow, he said everyone was getting yelled at and getting blue cards all at once. Apparently, people were visiting the academy so it may have been a show as to how order is kept, badges are earned, and the finest law enforcement agency in the word is created. Blue card or not, Kev is a part of that!

After appetites were lost, the cadets had lunch, followed by their spelling test and class on accident investigations until dinner time. That was it for the day. Kev and I had a long talk about the lunch incident and he told me how disappointed he was with himself for getting a blue card on a knowledge question he knew. He said even his roommate told him he couldn't believe he got it wrong because even he knew Kev knew the answer. I told Kev that he has been doing so well, and the only way to get better and excel at anything is to have your weaknesses exposed and challenged. Kev's weakness is performing under stress. He can easily absorb the knowledge he is taught and perform physically, but maintaining focus in the midst of chaos is tough and will take time to master. It's better he learns to overcome these challenges at the academy than while on duty and he understands that entirely. I think that is going to be his personal goal for the second month at the academy - In the midst of upheaval and pandemonium, maintain focus and control of your mind and actions. At least there is something my man needs improvement on. Otherwise, he is handsome, smart, loving, compassionate, strong, driven and an all around beautiful soul. One more day until the weekend!

- Mimi

Day 24/194

Wednesday, Week 4!
Well, we are half way through the week! My day was fairly uneventful, other than going to meet another girlfriend who does my hair. I got a Brazilian, so my hair will look pretty when Kev gets home and it will take half the time to style. Therefore, more time with my man! But let's get to Kev.. what you really care about ;)

So, even though Kev got 3 blue cards last week, he surprisingly didn't have his name up at the Staff Office notifying him that he lost his Wednesday night liberty. He thinks they waved everyone's blue card for "poor PT performance" during the shoe incident. Kev says the accidental shoe thief or newly dubbed "No Shoes" was given a lot of grief by his peers last week. He wasn't sure if he would stick it out, but he did and the hazing has apparently died down. Kev and I felt bad for the poor kid, but Kev said he made an effort to say hi to him a couple times after. You never know when those little acts of kindness will pick someone's spirit up, especially in an already tough environment. The kid accidentally grabbed someone else's shoes and the class paid. It's part of the Academy culture to shame him, but props to him for keeping his head up and sticking it out! Anyhow, Kev and the guys were off around 5 PM and went to Chipotle, followed by more Krispy Kreme donuts. From all the donuts and cookies I tell you he eats, you're probably assuming he is a little chub nut but that lucky little turd has the metabolism of an 18 year old marathon runner. Slightly hate him for that! ;)

They were back at their quad around 7 PM, when he called right before my appointment. We talked for a little but I had to call him back after to hear about the rest of his day. This actually gave him time to study for his test the next day on everything they learned about crimes against children and another spelling test. The spelling test will consist of 15 spelling words and 5 other questions. I think the other 5 questions are vehicle code or something, I forget what he said. All the acronyms and merging learning domains get confusing! He also said he got a 100% on his last test about crimes against the Justice System.

He had PT in the morning, which he says has been getting easier. To clarify, I believe he means his body is getting used to it and not that the activity has been any lighter. He also had more PMA where the cadets learned different ways to hold and draw the baton. He enjoyed it. He told me when they first got their batons, that if any cadet drops it they have to tell the cadet in charge of counting the dropped batons and it costs the entire class 10 push ups per drop! Kev also said that 5 minutes before the fountain ceremony, the Juniors were told that they wouldn't be attending the ceremony and to report to class. No explanation as to why, but I'm sure Kev's uniform was perfect and his brass and shoes were shining in preparation... oh well, he can look spiffy sitting in class!

Two more days and we are ONE month down!! Hoorahhhhh :)

- Mimi

Day 23/194

Tuesday, Week 4!
Yesterday was a good day. Work went well and since a few people on the team are on vacation this week, it has been pretty laid back and easy to narrow in on priorities.  After work I met up with my girlfriend from the night before and another girlfriend of ours for dinner in the city. I had an amazing quinoa, roasted beat and chicken salad with a pinot grigio. It hit the spot in addition to enjoying the company of the girls.

Kev text me that he was off around 8 PM and I gave him a quick call from the restroom of the restaurant to say hi ;) I told him I missed him, would finish up with the girls and call him when I got home. He understood that I needed girl time and it gave him time to study anyways, so he didn't mind. We normally start our evening chats talking about his day, mostly because I ask and have to know about how his day went before I can tell him about how great my Excel spreadsheet skills were that day! While Kev never makes me feel inferior to his academy life and genuinely cares about anything I say, I'll usually save the exciting details of my revenue accounting for last. However, tonight he saved the stories of his day for last and let me ramble on about everything I talked about with the girls and a little boasting about all the good things I had to say about him. I was "clucking" as Kev calls it, hens cluck! I know deep down he loves it though! ;)

So now, about Kev's day! He was able to sleep in until 6 AM because there was no PT. PT is scheduled for Monday, Wednesday, and Friday each week. When he first arrived at the academy, his class was split into two "companies" - Company A and Company B. Today Company A received their guns while Company B (Kev) had vehicle code all morning until lunch time. Kev says vehicle code is what they will refer to most as officers, and while they need to learn about other crimes, a lot of class hours are allocated to VC. After lunch they ran out to the drill pad to practice drill and marching for about 15 minutes. Kev says they run everywhere and while drill is nice to see everyone in unison, he can't help but think of the time he could be spending studying for the next test. After drill, he ran back to class for the rest of the evening, had dinner and then practiced their line up for the Fountain Ceremony the next day. Apparently that is when the inspection will happen. I misunderstood him the night before, because I thought he had inspection today. I am starting to think he just likes shining his boots and brass ;) He does talk about how strikingly shiny the Staff Officer's brass always looks and how impressive it is. Anyways, the Juniors and Seniors have to look flawless to show their respect at the weekly Fountain Ceremony. He said the Juniors line up against the outside of the quad to watch as the Seniors perform the ceremony and shine the brass names of fallen officers. Kev says it's a nice ceremony and a constant reminder of why he has to pay so much attention and try his hardest while at the academy. He said the most recent name on the fountain is from 2014.

Tuesday and Wednesday are always the hardest days of the week and when I miss Kev the most. Monday feels like I just saw him, but Tuesday and Wednesday feel like I still have a long time to wait to see him. By Thursday, I'm excited to see him on Friday, and on Friday I know I get to see him that night so I'm antsy all day! I hope when the Spring sun comes out and the weather warms up, it doesn't feel like such a monotonous week of waiting! I'll drive myself nuts! Anyhow, Kev is supposed to get his gun and pepper spray today (Wednesday) and have a gun safety class. Then he has to start wearing his vest everyday. I'm pretty sure this is the day every cadet waits for! Well, shooting and driving fast I would guess! I can't wait to hear all about it tonight!

- Mimi

Day 22/194 - Start of Week 4!

Monday, Week 4!
How is it already week 4?! It still seems like an unbelievably long road ahead but I hope the pace continues the way it is. Work has been going well for me, even though the particular start-up I work for has had a whirl wind of bad press lately. However, I guess you can say that has been keeping things interesting on the forefront. I also went to dinner with a good girlfriend after work and it was so nice to catch up and feel like I actually did something other than work and wait for Kev to come home ;)

Kev text me around 6:30 PM when I was heading home and said he had a quick break before drill. When we talked after dinner, he was polishing his boots and brass for inspection the next day. The blue tooth has been a true blessing for us! He told me what drill is - basically it's learning how to march in place in unison. The details didn't sound particularly fun. He also received a 90% on his sex crimes test. I get so excited to hear when he does well on a test. He said he learned about crimes against children and more about officer casualties today. Some of the stories he told me that were shared with him are pretty terrible. I told him I hope he only has to save puppies and kitties in his career (kidding of course!) but he says its a good reminder of why his job is so important - to help people. Still no gun yet, but I know he can't wait!

That's about it for our Monday. We didn't get to Carmel over the weekend but we are looking forward to this coming weekend. My parent's are going to Mexico, so we are escaping my two roommates and housesitting for the weekend alone! I love my roomies, but the idea of the house to ourselves is amazing. We hope to lay pool side and BBQ if the weather is nice enough, let's cross our fingers :)

- Mimi

Day 19-21/194

Friday, Week 3!
I forget exactly what time Kev called on Friday, because honestly I could care less about blogging when I know he is on his way home! I want to say he got to my house around 7:30. He text me that he was parking, and I couldn't even wait for him to walk to my door. I put a pair of shoes on and ran out to him. He put his war bag and duffle down and I jumped in his arms. Being in his arms at the very moment is worth the entire wait of the week!

I had got off work early and had a chance to run to the store to buy something to make for dinner. Kev always likes to help cook, so together we made Chinese chicken lettuce cups. I think he enjoyed being able to eat a little late, since at the academy they have dinner around 5 PM and don't eat again for the rest of the night since they can't have food in their rooms. After dinner, we just laid around and he told me more details of his day and week. His Friday started out with PT and more running, followed by a test on property crimes which he got a 93% on! :) Then he told me they did PMA training and were taught a few techniques that they got to practice on punching bags. Sounds like he really enjoyed PMA and had a good time. He also got his body armor, aka vest last week - exciting! Lastly and most exciting, he found out that he gets his gun next week and gets to go to the range for the first time! He got new blue CHP shirts for the range, and of course he can't wait!

I'm loving the new book, "Cadet Blues" so far too! I didn't read any over the weekend, but I asked Kev about some parts of the book and it seems pretty spot on. Kev sometimes neglects to tell me the little details of his day, so the book fills in the academy culture that is already routine to my guy. For instance, when they go out on academy grounds or to march, if one cadet brings a jacket the rest must also wear their jackets. Kev said the other day a couple cadets grabbed their jackets when it was 75 degrees out and he was a little frustrated when he ended up sweating all day!

Saturday & Sunday!
The rest of the weekend was pretty mellow again. Kev seems to get stressed on Sunday when we wait to do all of his 'chores' for the academy until the last day. So, we decided from now on to do everything on Saturday which leaves us with a much more relaxing Sunday together. On Saturday, we washed and folded all his academy clothes and towels and buzzed his hair. That is usually all there is to do, but with everything on his mind for the week, it tends to just be added pressure waiting until Sunday. We did a little workout on Saturday too, with some squats and jumprope and then went to dinner with his parents. We also pull out his flashcards throughout the day to study his vehicle and penal codes, he is getting really good :)

Kev said that next week the seniors are going to inspect all the juniors' vehicles for violations. So, he cleaned up his truck a bit on Sunday in preparation. He said some guys needed to get mud flaps and other things on their cars over the weekend. Thankfully, Kev just had to clean his headlights. Then we headed over to my parents' house for dinner in the afternoon and went back to my house after for Kev to pack up and study a little for his test on Monday - sex crimes. I was reading over his shoulder and having him read to me to help him study, but when he was reading the part about the investigation after the crime was committed, he told me I didn't want to hear it. I was okay with that. In the last book I read, "A CHiP on my Shoulder," it says you need to be a confidant for your officer and how you react to what they tell you will depict what they tell you about their job moving forward. It says they need to be able to confide in you and talk to someone other than law enforcement, and that can sometimes be you. I know Kev will always want to protect me from hearing the bad stuff, but as he becomes more inculcated in the job I hope he feels comfortable sharing more with me.

My last thought has to do with friendships right now. It has been hard finding balance because the weekends seem to fly by and we want to spend every second together. Friends reached out to hang out with us this weekend but I was quick to turn them down. However, I know I can't continue to do that for the remainder of the time he is at the academy. I suppose it is also the "exodus of our 20s." We are growing up and re-evaluating who we want to be in our lives and what kind of people, especially when Kev becomes an officer. Perhaps weeding out some of the 'party' friends and spending the little time we have together these days with friends who have similar career focus and morale is a step further towards growing up. It's all a learning process for us, and I'm sure we will find balance as time goes on.

Of course, Kev leaving to go back to the academy was hard. However, when I went back upstairs to wash my face and brush my teeth, there was a hidden card in my bathroom drawer with my name on it and that was the perfect end to my weekend :)

Wishing Kev and the other cadets the best of luck this week! Making it through this week, means we are 1 of 6 months down and the cadets get their first pay checks!

-Mimi

Day 18/194

Thursday, Week 3!
It's almost Friday, which means I almost get to see Kev! Good God, will this ever pressing feeling to see him at the end of each week ever settle down? How am I supposed to manage being this eager on a weekly basis for 6 months!? I better get used to it! And this weekend, I am going to attempt not to dread Sunday the whole time but instead to appreciate the time we haven while we have it. Anyhow, I crushed the gym after work and I am officially 11 pounds down and really starting to tone up :) This has been helping my overall mood lately too and has given me something to focus on personally, in addition to success at work but rather than just investing all of my time to thinking about Kev at the academy.

I talked to Kev when I got home from the gym, but he didn't text me that he was done for the day until about 8:30 PM. Mind you, he was up at 4:30 AM to 'practice' putting the PT mats away. He said that basically consisted of meeting in the gym at 4:30 AM and being advised by the PT staff that "we can't force you to practice putting the mats away, but we highly suggest it." Kev has heard this "we highly suggest it" statement a few times and it seems that is a passive aggressive way the academy likes to tell the cadets they better so something or they will regret it later. After practice, the day was followed with classroom work and a surprise spelling quiz. Kev missed 3 of the spelling words and as a result he has to write a memo for each, in which he also has to write the word 25 times. He said they also started PMA (Physical Methods of Arrest). This is exciting because Kev now gets to wear his cop belt the rest of the time at the academy, with his cuffs and baton. He is stoked, but said that sitting in a classroom chair all day with a baton hanging from your belt is a little uncomfortable at first. The cadets also learned their fighting stance. I honestly can't remember what Kev called it but it is the stance they take when they approach someone that gives them an advantage if they were to need to jump into action. He said they then passed out pretty graphic images of crime scenes and officers who were killed on duty. Kev is a pretty strong willed and strong minded individual, but said this was certainly eye opening and moving. I finished reading "A CHiP on my Shoulder" which also touches on this unnerving subject in a few chapters. It is definitely something that is still new and daunting to me. When I met Kev he told me he was waiting to be accepted into the academy and wanted to be a CHP officer. To be honest, I didn't think much of it at first. Now that I am his girlfriend and have come to love him more and more each day, I respect him so much more for the career he chose. However, the vow he will one day pledge to "lay down your life rather than swerve from the path of duty" scares me so much. I keep reminding him that is one of the reasons why he needs to give 110% to the academy and consume all the education they give him - so he is prepared for the next 28 years on the job .

I would highly suggest reading "A CHiP on my Shoulder". It was a great book written from the viewpoint of a wife who was married to a CHP officer for over 20 years. She recalls stories of other law enforcement couples she has befriended over the years and couples their strengths and hardships with that of her own family. She provides great advice for both sides of the relationship and tips for success in sustaining a long and happy relationship with a law enforcement officer. I thoroughly enjoyed it! I also bought "Cadet Blues" on Amazon, so I am on to a new book. This one is about a gentleman who was a college dropout and joined the academy to change his life and make his family proud. He describes each day at the academy, much like my blog but through the eyes of a cadet. I swear my next book choice will be something non-CHP related! ;)

- Mimi

Day 17/194

Wednesday, Week 3!

We finally wrapped up the fiscal year close at work and celebrated with a team event to Lagunitas Brewery in Petaluma for the day. I am so glad to be done! February started off pretty rough, so I'm glad that a new leaf turned for me this week. I've almost kicked this cold entirely, finished the close at work, and all around feel much better. That means, Kev will get the real, happy Mimi this weekend! Finally, poor guy! He has been so sweet tending to my emotions and caring for me while he was sick himself. We deserve some fun this weekend, and I fully intend to get us out of the house on Saturday:)

Kev called just after 6 PM when I was on my way home. I saw his missed call and voicemail, which I would have been so upset about missing week 1 but now we have a pretty good understanding that we will catch up each evening and I don't worry as much about when I'll talk to him because I know I will. He had PT in the morning, at which point he said there was a big fiasco when one of the cadets took another cadet's shoes and flashlight. The cadet missing his gear told the PT officers (Kev says the PT officers are the strictest at the academy), and they lined up all the cadets to see who had taken the shoes. It was an accident of course, but the cadet was probably too scared for the consequences to admit he made a mistake. All the cadets were then asked to take out their blue cards (gigs) that they are required to keep in there shoes during PT in case they need to be written up. Apparently, at some point they were told to pre-fill those blue cards with "poor PT performance" but no one in the class had done so and all of the cards were blank except for the cards of the two retreads who knew from experience to have them filled out. That meant, everyone except the retreads got a gig for 'poor PT performance' since they didn't listen and the blue cards weren't pre-filled. They also identified the cadet with the extra shoes and flashlight. However, that meant Kev got his 3rd gig for the week and he loses his Wednesday liberty next week.

Other than the PT incident, Kev said he had a good day. He got a 96% (I believe) on his test about murder investigation. He told me one of the questions was something about, is it first degree murder if you park your car on the train tracks, the train hits the car and the conductor is killed. Now, mind you I could be completely off here.. I'm an accountant! However, I am pretty sure that is what the test was about:)  He also said he has been really hungry lately, and has been eating a lot of the cookies which he thinks are homemade. He is killing me with these cookies! Good thing Kev is naturally slim and can afford them. He just better hope the PT officers don't catch on to how many he is eating;) That reminds me, Kev said the PT officers were also upset with how they put the mats away after their workout, so they had to wake up at 4:30 the next day (today) to be properly shown how to put the mats away. I'm not sure what that entailed but I'm sure it wasn't fun! I'll let you know what he says. That's about it for his day. We had another nice FaceTime session, and it has been great to see his face more often! One and a half more days until he is home!!

- Mimi

Day 16/194

Tuesday, Week 3!
I was planning on going to the gym after work today but unfortunately I had to work late to finish the close, and ended up staying at the office until 7:45 PM. I was hoping to make time for cardio followed by yoga at 8:30 PM but those plans were out the window since it takes me an hour to get home. I haven't been able to work out as much as I had hoped, but I lost 10 pounds from being sick! Not the best way to tone up for summer, but I'll take it;) Kev called me right as I was wrapping up at the office and we talked for a bit on my walk to BART, then we decided we would just FaceTime when I got home.

I made some quick eggs, washed my face, and jumped on FaceTime! I missed him a lot. It's easy to feel lonely when your cadet is away, and I find myself constantly waiting for Friday and then when Friday rolls around, I'm dreading Sunday the whole time! It's a cycle I need to learn to break, and to just enjoy the moment. Anyhow, Kev's spirits weren't as high during this call. While on FaceTime, he was making a new CHP PT shirt because his last one was kicked back.. again! It seems it wasn't because it wasn't dark enough, but because it was 7 inches from the neckline, not 6 inches per the instructions. Apparently we measured to the top of the stencil, not the top of the actual letters. I can't believe how much work these shirts turned out to be, and I feel bad that I didn't help Kev do it right the first time so he didn't have to stress about a T-shirt amidst everything else mid-week. Of course, he was sweet about it though, and didn't seem to mind. He said he got his first gig today, followed by another one shortly after. He was walking in the hall with his coffee and held his coffee in his right hand for a few moments while reaching for something in his bag. Before he knew it, a staff officer walked past him and then backed up to circle and observe him. He was then given a gig for holding his coffee in his right hand, his gun hand. The SOPs say that you must always keep your gun hand free. Kev says now that the cadets have taken the SOP test, staff officers are passing out gigs left and right. Then when Kev had to turn in his gig to the staff office, he was reprimanded for his stance, asked if he was there to quit, told to save his disappointed look for his own time, and given ANOTHER gig for his attention stance not being to par. Kev said he felt pretty disappointed and didn't want to be seen as 'that guy'. However, I told him he was bound to get a gig sooner or later and it is just a reminder to keep his head in the game and not to get too cocky. He can be proud of himself when he does well on a test (he got another 100% on a quiz) but he needs to remain constantly aware of his actions and attention to detail. It's important for when he graduates and is out in the field so that he can stay safe, and we both know that. It was a hard day, but full of lessons learned and that's what the academy is about! "You may not be able to control every situation and its outcome, but you can control your attitude and how you deal with it." Tomorrow is another day to give it your all! Three days until I see my babe again! We are talking about doing a day trip this weekend. Maybe Carmel by the Sea if the weather is nice:)

- Mimi

Day 15/194 - Start of Week 3!

Monday, Week 3!
I had the day off for President's Day and couldn't have been happier. It felt so nice to relax! I laid out in the sun down by the pool and read some of "A CHiP on my Shoulder" for about an hour in the morning. I shut my eyes for a bit and then got changed to go to my hair appointment. I went a little darker and got a fresh trim. It was nice to be pampered and to chit chat for a bit. My mom's best friend owns the salon and my girlfriend works there and does my hair, so it was nice to catch up with both ladies for a while. I haven't really seen my friends a lot lately, so it was refreshing to have some girl time. I dropped by my parents after the salon and then decided to grab an early dinner with my mom. We had such a nice evening catching up. I was just saying good bye and walking to my car when Kev called around 6:30 PM. Here is a little summary of the first Monday of week 3!

- He started the morning off with breakfast and PT. More calisthenics and obstacle courses, followed by a mile and a half run. Again, he did great with push ups, pull ups, and even the course but struggled with the run. He had to stop to catch his breath and unfortunately didn't make time.

- They tested cadets for the training table today. Kev is 13% body fat so is not on the table. Men are able to be 16% and women can be 20%. That meant Kev went for the cookies after dinner;)

- They are still being tested by the staff officers any chance they get. Kev has been doing well with the spontaneous quizzes, but his roommate missed a few and has 3 'gigs' total now (gigs are blue cards) so now he lost his Wednesday liberty.

- An officer came in during classroom time and had the cadets pull the trigger of a gun 34X on each hand. Kev had no problem, but said a couple people couldn't do it.

- He found out he got a 100% on the learning domain test he took on Friday.

- He had a test today on the SOP's and he thinks he did okay but could have done better. He says he needs to relearn 'how to test'. He knows the material but needs to improve on testing. There are a few more tests this week too. The pace is definitely picking up.

- The one CHP shirt we made that he had to turn in, was returned to him to darken his name on the back. Those took us forever to measure and make perfect, so the officers sure hurt my feelings when I heard that ;)

- We FaceTimed before bed and decided we want to do that more often to see each other's faces. When we saw each other on Friday, it felt like it had been forever since we had seen each other! I have only seen his buzzed head a handful of times too, so it is still new to me. We continue to buzz it every Sunday before he leaves.

- I believe Kev said they are down 3 cadets so far. One was left by his parents at his hotel after Orientation, panicked and never came to day 1, and another quit after the first day of PT. I'm not sure why the 3rd cadet left.

Anyhow, that's about it for today! I can't believe we are already on week 3. I hope the weeks continue to fly by. All I keep thinking about is graduation day and getting to move in with Kev after the academy! There are so many good things to come after we get through this!

- Mimi

Day 12-14/194

Friday, Week 2!
I took work off on Friday for my grandma's service. It was a full day event and was very heavy emotionally. I got home in the evening when Kev called to say he was on his way home. I was so excited to see him and get a big hug, but I felt bad that I likely didn't sound as excited as I was. I literally was just emotionally drained! When he got there, I jumped into his arms. We didn't do much on Friday night, but lay together and cuddle. It was just what I needed and Kev didn't seem to mind either.

Saturday & Sunday:
So Kev got his PT shirts last week and this weekend's main agenda was to cut stencils and use the fabric markers we bought to write his last name on the back of his shirts per the specific instructions he received. This is more time consuming than you can imagine! However, Kev doesn't get to wear his 'CHP' shirt right now because unfortunately he couldn't keep the pace with his PT instructor on the run after training. He said he did great during the 45 minutes of push ups, pull ups, and other calisthenics prior to the run but that keeping up then hindered his endurance during the run. He said other guys who did finish the run were struggling during the calisthenics portion and were laying down at the front of the class because per the instructors they gave up and were now 'dead on the side of the road'. Those cadets still get to keep their CHP shirts since they finished the run in the allotted time. Kev says its all how you test. It's a game of balance to succeed across the board. So on Monday, he has to turn in his CHP shirt, ironed, with his name on it and wear 'marshmallow' shirts until he earns it back. The 'marshmallow' shirts are just plain white shirts with his name in smaller letters on the back.

We were both still a little sick this weekend so we laid pretty low. This was the first weekend Kev was noticeably a little high strung from the week. It wasn't too hard to talk to him and calm him though. We did his laundry, made turkey tacos for dinner and watched a couple movies we rented from Red Box. All he wanted to do was relax, and he looked like he was in Heaven laying on the mounds of pillow on my bed;) Sunday was Valentine's Day, but we had already celebrated before he left with a trip to Tahoe, a fancy dinner, and of course Kev showered me with sweet gifts. We weren't sure if we would be able to spend the day together, so we made sure to celebrate when we could. We went and visited his parents for a bit and then went home to pack him up. We just ate left-overs for dinner, but neither of us minded. All we cared about was being together. That was what made Valentine's Day perfect. Then it was time to say good bye around 8:30 pm. It literally felt like he had just arrived, the weekend flew by. He called when he got home to say goodnight, and we were onto week 3!

- Mimi

Day 10/194

Wednesday, Week 2!
Okay, so first a little background on the days I am writing about. This post is day 10 / week 2 but because I typically hear from Kev late in the evening, I am typically writing about the day prior. So today is Thursday (Day 11) but I am writing about yesterday (day 10). I am also counting the weekends as days at the academy since Kev has to study and do academy 'errands' on those days as well.  Hope that helps clarify!

So now, about day 10! Kev text me around 5:30 yesterday when he finished up his class work for the day and got his first Wednesday liberty! He seemed pretty excited to have liberty and was getting ready to go get some dinner off campus with his roommates. Kev called me when he got back from dinner and said they ended up going to In-N-Out followed by Krispy Kreme, Trust me, I was shaking my head too! Apparently it was an attempt to carb-load prior to their first first PT coming up the next day and he insists they burn off all the food the academy supplies them! Kev said it tasted so good and they saw a lot of other cadets out too. He said everyone was chatting and catching up, and that for the most part all the cadets are really friendly with each other.  He said his day went well and the learning pace is picking up. He was shining his boots while talking to me on his bluetooth and says they are finally getting really shiny! The bluetooth is great because Kev can shine his shoes or prep for the next day and talk to me at the same time. His day was mostly class work again and he said the staff officers quizzed them while they waited in line for the bathroom. Kev says he knew the answer when they got to him;) Good job babe! We caught up for a bit longer and he asked me about my day too, which he always makes sure to do. I really just want to kick this cold and feel better already. Then I had to let him go because he had to study for his first test the next day and get all of his things ready. Kev has his Masters in Criminal Justice though, so he says it's nice that most of the stuff they are learning now is review for him. Regardless, I keep telling him to study hard! The graduating cadet's badge numbers are given based on what number you graduate in your class, or in other words how well you do in comparison to your peers. So, I keep telling him to work really hard and get 'us' a good badge number! ;) 

- Mimi

Day 9/194

Tuesday, Week 2!
Last night I came home from work early because I wasn't feeling well. Early, meaning I left at 5 pm which is a short day in the SF start-up world. I was feeling sick all day, so I went home, took some medicine and passed out by 7. Kev called around 8:30. I woke up right away to talk to him but unfortunately I was a little groggy from the medicine. I miss Kev so much right now, especially since I am sick too. If he were here, I know he would be by my side helping me feel better. It's hard not having him around as much and the reality of the length of time he will be away becomes more real every day. I'm just trying not to let it get to me.

Kev's spirits are really high. Surprisingly, he seems excited by the strict regiment of the academy. He also says he kicked his cold and thinks it's because of all the water he is forced to drink there. He says his class is now studying the learning domains and they already have a bunch of tests coming up. He has a test on domain 2 on Thursday and domain 3 on Friday, then Monday he has a test on the SOPs (Standard Operating Procedures). In addition to a lot of class work, Kev and his class also learned how to shine the brass yesterday. Apparently, every Wednesday the Juniors have to take time to shine all the brass on the campus from the door knobs to the kick stands. 

That was about the extent of our conversation yesterday since I was so sick and exhausted. Kev seemed to have a lot to do anyhow, such as studying and preparing for the next day so I guess it worked out. I felt a little sad this morning though since I didn't have the chance to chat with him for very long. Before he left for the academy, we spent every night together and I called him every day on my way home from work. I really hope this gets easier and more natural for us both soon. On a positive note, there are only a couple more days until the weekend and our first Valentine's Day together! I can't wait :) 

Day 8/194 - Start of week 2

Monday, Week 2!
The fact that Kev is going to be at the academy for a long time keeps becoming more and more real. It's been a little lonely trying to manage my time and not being able to talk to Kev throughout the day. However, work has been really busy and I have a little extra motivation lately. Telling Kev to give the academy all he's got definitely has me re-evaluating the effort I give in certain areas of my life and I am trying a little harder lately too. I also ordered two books I am excited to read, "Cadet Blues" and "CHiP on my Shoulder". I have read good things about them, so it should be a fun and relevant read while Kev is away.

Last week the cadets were issued their penal code and vehicle code books which is what Kev was studying over the weekend. I got to talk to Kev last night (Monday, Week 2) a little after 9 pm. The cadets were in training from 7 am - 9 pm yesterday. Kev says they woke up and went to the auditorium. He says the staff officers ran everyone in for paperwork in the midst of blaring horns and sirens, while yelling at them. He said it definitely added pressure when completing the forms and if you messed up, you had to stand up and explain the mistake you made to the staff officer and request a new form. A few people made mistakes, so the class was forced to go outside and do push ups on the grass. 

Kev also received his blues yesterday but the people who fitted him issued him a medium when he typically wears a large. He said the medium is too small which means he has to exchange the shirts one at a time since it takes up to 2 weeks to receive them back. Surprisingly, he isn't too stressed about the whole dilemma and knows what he needs to do to take care of it. He is also really excited because they received their hand cuffs and batons too! 

That's about all I got out of him yesterday because he had to take care of some things and I came down with a little cold so I had to get to sleep. I actually think I got the cold from Kev over the weekend because he had a pretty bad cough too. He is still a little sick, but thankfully PT hasn't started yet. The pace at the academy should really pick up as the cadets become inculcated into the CHP culture.  We just have to stay focused on the goal ahead and all the wins along the way:)

Day 5 & Our First Weekend

Friday, Day 5, Week 1!
We made it to the end of week 1! Kev was off around 5ish on Friday. He said he was one of the first to sign out, so he beat the line. When he got to my house he knocked on the door and had a dozen red roses for me! I love him so much:) After the week I had, I can't even begin tell you how nice it was to be in his arms. We went to sushi for dinner and had a really mellow night with a few stories, but mostly just cuddling and unwinding.  This week was pretty easy for him, so there aren't too many exciting stories... yet!

We did a lot of laundry and shopping this weekend. Kev realized that even though they can have a room inspection at any time, they can have more personal items than we thought. Here are some of the items we bought this weekend. Some he was advised to buy and others he realized he needed after week 1.



- Closet organization bin with 4 drawers
- Mints (These are okay, just no gum)
- Jewelry wipes (To keep in his pocket to wipe his brass if it gets smudged - suggested by a retread)
- Fabric pens (They recommended a few)
- Zebra pens (Apparently they are fine tipped and easy to write with)
- Monthly pocket calendar
- Small 'memo' notebooks
- Clipboard
- Binder clips
- 3" binder & two 1" binders
- Notebooks
- Flash cards
- Shower caddy
- Toothbrush case
- Air freshening spray & Lysol
- Tidepen
- Case of water (They can only have water in their rooms, no other food or drinks)

Overall, we had a great weekend together. We are really expecting things to pick up this week now that the stress management classes are over. Kev has a pretty positive attitude coming into week 2 and is excited to really get started. We did some studying over the weekend and he is doing so well memorizing the codes. There are a lot, but it's kind of fun:) On Sunday, we buzzed his hair down to a one again and he shaved his face. Since he doesn't have his blues yet, he had to wear his business attire to the academy when he left around  8 PM.  For some reason, it wasn't as hard letting him go this time. I guess the weekend restored my faith that we will only get closer as we go through this and each week he completes is another step closer to his dream of becoming an officer and starting a life together.

I read a few blogs before Kev started the academy and remember being concerned that I wouldn't have the chance to talk to Kev everyday. That was my biggest worry. As the pace picks up at the academy, I'm sure we won't be able to connect with him as much as we have but I think it all depends on the relationship. I talked to Kev about letting me know if he is busy or can't talk, because I don't ever want him to not want to call or text me when he is off for the day in an effort to avoid a long call. We have both accepted that this is something we have to get through together. Your cadet needs you to be positive for them just as much as you need them to be positive for you. Accept the circumstances, respect their downtime, and try to make your phone calls something you can both look forward to!

On to week 2 of 28!

- Mimi

Day 4

Thursday, Day 4, Week 1!
This is a s l o w week.It has been such a rough week for me at home and I really can't wait to see Kev tomorrow. I got another text this morning and he called me around 8:15 last night when he got back to his room and read my text about my grandma. He locks his phone in his closet/locker until he returns to his room in the evening. We have been able to text every morning and talk every night so far.  Last night we talked for over an hour. As usual, he was so sweet and caring. He made sure I was okay and then picked up my spirits by telling me a little about his day too. Surprisingly he already sounded more natural with his roommates around. When I mentioned something, he said they have gotten much closer in just a couple days. One of his roommates is married and the other is engaged, so Kev says they talk on the phone at night too. I'm sure if they aren't being sweet on the phone, their ladies won't be too happy either, so I'm glad the guys figured things out.

Anyhow, Kev says they are still learning about stress management in class from about 6 am - 8 pm. He also said they have about 15 minutes to eat and during breakfast they were advised to mix their yogurt with their oatmeal to eat it faster if it was too hot. He says the food isn't bad at all. Kev has a sweet tooth though, so he said he finally caved and had a piece of the sheet cake they have in the cafeteria. He said it was so gross and salty. He is enjoying learning about stress management and says next week is supposed to be when the 'real' academy starts, aka. the yelling and longer, harder days. He seems to be excited for it though. He says the officers in class told them they have a lot of open positions across the state and therefore they really need the cadets to push through so they can become officers and fill the need. That's why this week has been entirely dedicated to learning about stress management and opening the cadet's minds to the reason for the authoritative environment and high performance expectations of the academy. 

Kev says they technically have liberty all week and can leave after class hours, but no-one is leaving since they aren't quite sure how it works. However, he gets to leave at 2 pm (not 12) tomorrow for the weekend. His family and I can't wait to see him! I can't wait for more stories when it's just us. Talking on the phone is interesting when I ask him more personal questions or questions about his roommates, For now, I'll ask the question and then give a couple options until he says yes. Anyhow, I need to finish up some work and then I'm heading to the gym with a friend tonight. I'm just trying to keep my head up this week. I'll let you know if Kev has any new updates tonight when I post tomorrow, but sounds like the exciting stuff will all be next week.

- Mimi

Day 2 & 3

Week 1!

Tuesday, Day 2:

Kev was able to send me a quick text yesterday morning around 5:30 am when he woke up. I hope he can continue to do this because it is so comforting to wake up to a text from him. I had a long day at work followed by a call that my grandma wasn't doing well. I rushed to the hospital to see her because her heart rate had fallen significantly. It was hard not having Kev with me for this and especially when it is still a time where I have to get used to not being able to call him when I need him. When I was finally able to talk to him around 8:30 pm yesterday, I told him about my grandma and that she wasn't in the best shape tonight. We said we would both say a prayer for her before bed and pray for her to have the strength to pull through. He told me a little about his day too and said they were still focusing on stress management and had a couple officers come in and tell their stories. He also said they are still working on filling out paperwork, as well as learning to march, address each other, and make beds. Yesterday, was a tough day for me because I was trying so hard to remind myself that he would have been there for me under any other circumstances. It's also hard because Kev has to get used to talking to me with his roommates in the room. I understand it's a new environment and he is talking to me in front of guys he just met, so it will just take time to be natural. He lives with one 'retread' (someone going through the academy for a second time) and says that he hears him talking to his girlfriend like no one is around, so I'm sure that will be Kev soon enough too.

Wednesday, Day 3:

I got another text from Kev around 5:30 am this morning. I can't tell you how much I love his good morning texts. He told me he loved me and he said another prayer for my grandma this morning. 

I was on Bart around 7:30 when my dad called. My grandma passed away just after 7 am. Not being able to call Kev after that call was so hard. Kev and I had just visited with her the weekend before the academy. We had snacks together, she showed us her jackpot pictures from Harrah's in Tahoe, and we told her all about the academy. She was so happy for Kev and always told me how much she loved him. She wasn't able to to talk to me last night in the hospital but I told her she had to stick around for all the good things to come and we would try to get her an extra ticket for Kev's graduation from the CHP. I had also sent her a text before surgery telling her that she had to pull through so I could have my grandma at my wedding and so that she could meet my children one day, since I had never been so sure I found 'the one'. That's one of the hardest parts, knowing she will miss those moments in my life. She would have been so happy. She was also the one who cooked and coordinated Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas morning for the family. She held us all together. My grandma had also recently beat lung cancer too. I think she was just tired, she loved us all very much but she had to let go today. I took today off work to be with my family and sent Kev a brief text this morning after I found out. I can't tell you how hard today was. It's 7 pm right now and I can't wait for Kev to call. I feel terrible adding this stress to his first week, but I know he loves me with all his heart and wants to be there for me when I need him. I'm sure when the academy gets harder I'll be able to return the support. 

I told my grandma about this blog and she was reading along too. I never thought this post would be here. The world truly lost a beautiful soul today. She was one of the most amazing women I have ever met. She taught me to be kind, helpful, generous, and considerate. I'll have to try a little harder now to make up for the amount of compassion she had in her heart. I know she will be watching over me, rooting for Kev, and she will definitely be there when he gets his badge on grad day <3

All my love, Mimi

Day 1 & Done!!

Monday, Day 1, Week 1!
Today my phone went off a 5 am with a text from Kev. I was already laying there half awake so I quickly grabbed for the phone to call him. He sounded excited and ready to get started. It was a quick chat with more I love you and you can do it talk. He called me once more at 6:45 when he was headed over to the academy. I felt a little better then, honestly the anticipation of the 'unknown' seems to be the hardest part right now. I was on Bart headed to work in the city when 7:30 hit. I just kept picturing what I saw on orientation day in the videos of the first day - bags were thrown in a pile, the cadets were lines up and the yelling began.

It was time to focus a little on me in order to distract myself. My grandma had heart surgery this morning, so I was worrying about her and waiting for my Mom to call when she was out of surgery. Thankfully she did well and is in recovery now. At work, this is the last week to finish closing the fiscal year amongst a plethora of other projects with approaching deadlines. Typical SF start-up life. So, I am by no means short of things to think about!

I was on Bart heading home around 6:45 when I got a text from Kev! He said he would be able to call me later. I was so excited, because I had prepared myself for the possibility that I may not hear from him. I was home and changing for the gym when he called. It was so good to hear from him because I had been stressing all day wondering how his day was going and worrying about my grandma. To brief you, this week at the academy is supposed to be 'orientation week'. They said yesterday, that it is the first time they are doing this in an effort to cut down attrition at the academy. Apparently the average attrition rate is 40%. So, while this week is still going to be difficult for the cadets, it's intended to set a precedent as to why they are so tough on you. The cadets are also supposed to have phone access in the evenings this week and they should be able to come home at noon on Friday (only this first week). PT is said to start next week.

So here is what Kev said:

- There wasn't much yelling today, the officers were kind (way different than we both expected)

- They handed out stress management information (for their career in CHP, not just as a cadet)

- He likes his roommates, who are from down South

- Most of the day was spent in the classroom going over their HR paperwork and SOP (standard operating procedures)

- He says their first test will be on the SOPs on Monday

- Food wasn't bad and the living space is doable

- They were assigned a 'company' and 'squad' so that they can be split up into smaller groups for different courses 

- Beds were pre-assigned

- There is a cleaning service for their restrooms (with 12 guys, lucky them!)

 I can't tell you how much better I felt after hearing his day wasn't too stressful. So far, he seems happy and excited which makes me feel better too. After talking to him I headed to the gym and had a great workout! If Kev is going to be dieting and doing PT daily, I sure as hell am not letting him look better than me;) Today is day one of my ramped up diet and exercise plans! 

I got to chat with Kev one last time before he went to bed. I hope he sleeps okay tonight in his new home. I definitely can't get him off my mind and can't imagine how much more I am going to miss him as time goes on. Here we go, day one is done! 

- Mimi

Orientation Day

Yesterday was orientation day. Kev, his family and I got a hotel for Saturday night so we could be up early and on time to orientation, which started Sunday at 9 am. According to the academy, "if you're not early, you're late." So, we arrived around 8:20 in the gymnasium and we weren't the only ones. Being early also allowed us to secure 3rd row seats. Kev decided not to shave his hair yet and wanted to wait until that night, but we quickly noticed that most of the guys had already been shaved down. The Captain spoke and another officer lead most of the agenda for the day. There were videos about the pressures of the academy that cadets will be going through, but each of them ended with inspiration scenes of grad day, squad cars, CHP pilots, and all the other honorable positions that a cadet will have the opportunity to have if they give the academy 110%. They also had two current cadets in their 15th week speak to us. They spoke out to the new cadets and were honest about the hard work and expectations of the academy, but also highlighted that it has been one of the most exciting and fulfilling times of their lives. They repeated over and over, "it's not easy". A CHP wife also spoke, and was very inspirational to me and likely other family members, girlfriends, and wives who were also seeking some confirmation that our cadets can make it and so can we.  Cadets were able to ask questions and most asked about the first week; what was okay to bring, wear to bed, likelihood of weekend liberty, etc. We stopped for a break at one point and they asked the cadets to "line up on the North wall facing West". Kev headed over, mimicked the conformity of the current cadets we had seen through out the day, and walked out with the group. This was the first time he was alone with the officers. A few minutes later, the cadets came back in and Kev came over to us. We asked what they did and he said they were told to run over to the cafeteria (I think) and basically just got yelled at. He said one girl was yelled at for looking around and not keeping her eyes forward. Kev said they also told the class that they can see a few people still needed to cut their hair. So, if you're wondering whether to cut your hair for orientation... cut it and cut it short! Kev said some guys were told they could even go shorter. Finally, it was time for a tour! We saw the cafeteria, a classroom, and a few places cadets were told they should hope they are never called to. We also got to see the sacred CHP fountain with the names of fallen officers. It was a beautiful tribute but certainly a reminder of why the academy needs to be so difficult for the cadets, because it is not an easy job and they need to be prepared so they can come home to us every day. We also saw the rooms were the cadets would be staying. There are 4 conjoined rooms with a bathroom in the center. Each room has 3 beds, one bunk and a single. There is small closet space for each cadet, maybe 2 feet of space with space above the closet. The bathroom for all 12 cadets had 2 sinks, 2 stalls and 2 showers. It was tight quarters. I'm curious how the arrangements are made as to who get's which room, which bed, and how they plan to sleep, clean and study with so many people in such a small space. I'll keep you posted as I find out more.

After orientation, we went to lunch at BJ's. Kev saw a few guys he recognized from orientation. It was also easy to spot them with their shaved heads and bright orange HR folders the cadets had been handed in the morning. Kev made an effort to say hello before we sat for lunch. After lunch we said good bye to his parents and I stayed for a bit to help him pack up everything he had for the weekend that he didn't need or couldn't bring to the academy. We also shaved his head! Kev let me start with a 2 knowing that wasn't short enough. Since I had never seen him with his hair buzzed and it was the first sign of physical change, he let me come to my own conclusion that we needed to take it down to a 1. That was it, his bags were packed, his hair was shaved, and he was as ready as he would ever be. Leaving him was so hard. I tried to be strong, and reminded him that he has amazing support from his family and that I will always be there waiting for him at home. I definitely cried knowing that this was the start of a long journey for us both. Kev is such a great guy. He is so kind to everyone around him, and one of the best people I have ever met. He deserves the world. So knowing the stress he is about to endure, all I want to do is help him. However, I know he is strong, driven and won't give up. He will break in the right ways, and will soon be an officer to protect us all. I drove away crying, but talked to Kev on the phone before turning out the lights. It was the first night in a long time, with just kitty and I. We can do this.

- Mimi