Monday, Week 16!
Everyday we are closer! I had such a nice weekend with Kev, sometimes it feels like I have him back and then I quickly realize I don't quite yet. I suppose it's a good thing I miss his presence so much though. He truly is my best friend. I've been thinking a lot about life after graduation lately too. These next few months are going to be exciting and unveil a lot about our future. Depending on which office he is assigned to, our life will be so different. If he stays local, we will be close to his family and will find a place to rent together in an area we are familiar with. If he is assigned to LA or elsewhere, we will be packing up and moving to an area completely new to us. This is both exciting and a little scary. My parents actually just sold their home in California and are moving full time to their vacation home in Mexico. I don't have a very big family and just lost my grandma in February, so for me that's already a really big change in my life. I won't hesitate to move where ever Kev has to go, but I keep thinking about how much out life is about to change soon. If we move down South, we will be away from family and when Kev starts working graveyard shifts I will likely not see often since I'll be at work during the day, and I'll be in a town where I don't know anyone.However, everything happens for a reason and I know it will work out. We were so worried about what would happen when he went to the academy and it is nothing like we expected, so I am sure life after will work out as well! It's just easy to get lost in thought about it.
Kev is having a much better week! He is lucky to have a little weight off his shoulders this week though since he passed his scenarios, but unfortunately not everyone is in the same boat. Kev said he is going to help his good cadet friend practice this week, so he warned me he may have some late nights. He even offered his friend his Wednesday liberty to help him practice for the retake on Thursday. He really has a big heart and genuinely wants his friends and peers to succeed. He completely understands how stressful last week was since he experienced it too, so if there is anything he can do to help them feel more prepared, he will. There is also another new scenario this week for everyone, so he has to practice for that as well.
Monday consisted of range and a shooting competition. Kev said the Seniors were also invited to talk with the new class and answer some of their questions. He said they had a lot of questions and asked for advice about being there. He said his biggest piece of advice is that you have to want this with everything you've got.
-Mimi
Tuesday, May 17, 2016
Monday, May 16, 2016
Day 103-105/194
Friday - Sunday, Week 15!
Kev passed all 13 scenarios!!! His family and I were so excited when he told us on Friday! I was so relieved when I heard and we could all finallyyy relax. That also meant he got to come home for the weekend! Kev said about 50% of the class did not pass all the scenarios and will have to remediate the ones they didn't pass. I am so thankful Kev did well and was able to come home. His roommates had to stay over the weekend and unfortunately have to remediate, so I can only imagine what they are feeling and how their girlfriends/wives feel too. Kev really wants them to succeed, so we will be sending them a lot of good thoughts!!
Kev says rumor has it that Dream Sheets will be coming out in the next couple of weeks! He promised we could fill out our preferences together :) We are moving in together in August no matter where he ends up and I couldn't be more excited, even if that means packing up and moving down South! It really doesn't matter as long as we are together.. and kitty!
We had a great weekend together. The stress from the week was finally over and we were able to relax. The weather wasn't quite warm enough for the beach, so on Saturday we woke up and went to the gym, then went for lunch and an hour of foot reflexology. After reflexology we walked around a little festival downtown for a bit and met with Kev's parents for dinner. Sunday we went to the gym in the morning and did nothing but lounge around cuddling for the rest of the day. It was perfect! This weekend was exactly the refresh we needed, especially Kev. :)
Coming up this week is one more scenario test! However, we are assuming most of the focus will be on CTC 2-16 this week since their orientation week is now over. Kev says the campus feels packed because that class has about 150 new cadets. Kev's class is now in the 100 'teens'. A couple more cadets have dropped off. The class before his (CTC 3-15) graduated with 78 cadets, so hopefully Kev's class can stay afloat above that count and offer the state a lot of new officers!
We are on to week 16 and his weekly letter is in the mail box bound for West Sacramento!
- Mimi
Kev passed all 13 scenarios!!! His family and I were so excited when he told us on Friday! I was so relieved when I heard and we could all finallyyy relax. That also meant he got to come home for the weekend! Kev said about 50% of the class did not pass all the scenarios and will have to remediate the ones they didn't pass. I am so thankful Kev did well and was able to come home. His roommates had to stay over the weekend and unfortunately have to remediate, so I can only imagine what they are feeling and how their girlfriends/wives feel too. Kev really wants them to succeed, so we will be sending them a lot of good thoughts!!
Kev says rumor has it that Dream Sheets will be coming out in the next couple of weeks! He promised we could fill out our preferences together :) We are moving in together in August no matter where he ends up and I couldn't be more excited, even if that means packing up and moving down South! It really doesn't matter as long as we are together.. and kitty!
We had a great weekend together. The stress from the week was finally over and we were able to relax. The weather wasn't quite warm enough for the beach, so on Saturday we woke up and went to the gym, then went for lunch and an hour of foot reflexology. After reflexology we walked around a little festival downtown for a bit and met with Kev's parents for dinner. Sunday we went to the gym in the morning and did nothing but lounge around cuddling for the rest of the day. It was perfect! This weekend was exactly the refresh we needed, especially Kev. :)
Coming up this week is one more scenario test! However, we are assuming most of the focus will be on CTC 2-16 this week since their orientation week is now over. Kev says the campus feels packed because that class has about 150 new cadets. Kev's class is now in the 100 'teens'. A couple more cadets have dropped off. The class before his (CTC 3-15) graduated with 78 cadets, so hopefully Kev's class can stay afloat above that count and offer the state a lot of new officers!
We are on to week 16 and his weekly letter is in the mail box bound for West Sacramento!
- Mimi
Friday, May 13, 2016
Day 102/194 - Scenario Testing
Thursday, Week 15!
Basically the only good thing about this week is that there hasn't been any PT and won't be for two weeks during scenario testing. Everything that goes around comes around though at the academy, after scenarios there will be two weeks of PT 4 days (Mon - Thurs). Kev originally said the break was worth it, but I think we both quickly realized this week has in no way been a break. We have to look at the bright side though, he is still in the top of the class, passed pistol and shotgun certification this week, and is STILL THERE. On his pistol test he received a perfect score! He is strong, and challenges only make you stronger.
I can't write anything about scenario testing other than the fact that Kev is done with the ones this week! Scenarios are taken very seriously, even between the different academy companies since they test at different times. They aren't allowed to talk about it with each other either or it can be considered cheating. I didn't hear from Kev until about 9 PM yesterday and I had been waiting all day for that call to hear how he did! He said they tested all day long but he actually sounded a lot better on the phone last night than he did on Wednesday which was such a relief. Kev will find out today (Friday) if he passed. That means more losing my mind at my desk all day waiting for his text or call ;) With these really important tests, the wait makes me so anxious. I can only imagine how Kev feels. I know he gave it his all and tried his hardest though and that's all I can ask of him. I'm just praying he passed so we can have our much needed weekend together!
Kev also received the letter I sent on Monday :) He was so grateful for my letters this week and that I surprised him by driving to Sac. He said it really boosted his spirits going into the rest of the week. Sometimes I feel so helpless and I wish there was more I could do to support him while away, so it feels so nice to know how thankful and appreciative he of me. He is honestly such an amazing person and I know he will make a great officer!
Now time to get some work done and wait for the news!
- Mimi
Basically the only good thing about this week is that there hasn't been any PT and won't be for two weeks during scenario testing. Everything that goes around comes around though at the academy, after scenarios there will be two weeks of PT 4 days (Mon - Thurs). Kev originally said the break was worth it, but I think we both quickly realized this week has in no way been a break. We have to look at the bright side though, he is still in the top of the class, passed pistol and shotgun certification this week, and is STILL THERE. On his pistol test he received a perfect score! He is strong, and challenges only make you stronger.
I can't write anything about scenario testing other than the fact that Kev is done with the ones this week! Scenarios are taken very seriously, even between the different academy companies since they test at different times. They aren't allowed to talk about it with each other either or it can be considered cheating. I didn't hear from Kev until about 9 PM yesterday and I had been waiting all day for that call to hear how he did! He said they tested all day long but he actually sounded a lot better on the phone last night than he did on Wednesday which was such a relief. Kev will find out today (Friday) if he passed. That means more losing my mind at my desk all day waiting for his text or call ;) With these really important tests, the wait makes me so anxious. I can only imagine how Kev feels. I know he gave it his all and tried his hardest though and that's all I can ask of him. I'm just praying he passed so we can have our much needed weekend together!
Kev also received the letter I sent on Monday :) He was so grateful for my letters this week and that I surprised him by driving to Sac. He said it really boosted his spirits going into the rest of the week. Sometimes I feel so helpless and I wish there was more I could do to support him while away, so it feels so nice to know how thankful and appreciative he of me. He is honestly such an amazing person and I know he will make a great officer!
Now time to get some work done and wait for the news!
- Mimi
Thursday, May 12, 2016
Day 100 - 101/194
Tuesday & Wednesday, Week 15!
I can't even fathom that I am actually writing about day 100! It feels unreal! The new cadet class started on Monday and Kev said he watched how nervous they seemed and how timid they were to say hi to his class as they passed them in the halls. It must have felt like de ja vu. We both said that it feels like just yesterday that was him, nervous and unsure of what was to come. Kev is making sure to be kind to them, smile, and lead by example. Kev's first week at the academy, a senior told him to compact his water bottle in the chow hall before throwing it away - which he did and was promptly cringed at by a staff officer. Thankfully it was during orientation week when that happened so he didn't get yelled at. Kev knows the new cadets are no different than he was 3 months ago and some of them probably have a girlfriend or wife at home worried about this week and the next 6 months to come just like I was and am. In that case, I hope Kev's effort to give a friendly smile makes the difference in someone's day.
Kev had PMA practice for 4 hours on Tuesday morning, and then passed his pistol certification. His class received their riot helmets and had another lecture on use of force. Hearing that he received a riot helmet scared me a little. Another reminder of the dangers of the job and a little hard to get used to the idea hat Kev may actually have to use his gear one day. Kev and his class finally got to sit on the Senior side of the chow hall this week. We remember them pointing it out at orientation. Kev says it feels good and "the food tastes better when you sit over there." ;)
Some Tough Times & Scenario Testing -
The mood has significantly changed in Kev. These last couple of weeks have been some of the hardest so far, no doubt about it. Long days and nights, certifications, taser, gas, pepper spray, practice and testing have really began to wear him down. I could hear the exhaustion in his voice on the phone at night lately and see it on Facetime too. So, I drove up on Wednesday evening to surprise him during liberty. I even checked my texts from previous weeks to see what time Kev usually text me that he was done for the day and going out for dinner with the guys. I worked from home and made it up to the academy by 4:45 PM in order to beat traffic during rush hour. Kev isn't normally off on Wednesday around 5:30 - 6 PM, so I waited around and he finally text me at 5:30 saying he was in. I called him and told him I drove up to Sac! I knew he needed a hug this week and I was so happy to tell him I was here. He was so happy, thankful and surprised I came. He said the Sergeant wanted them to do PMA and it should only take an hour, then he would be off. I was so excited to see him! I went over to his little brother and sister in law's house to visit and see the baby while I killed time. They left to dinner and I shopped around for a bit waiting, but he didn't meet up until 8:30 PM:( He immediately vented and hugged me. My poor guy. Last night was the most stressed I have seen him. We went to dinner at Mikuni for about an hour and said our good bye so he could prepare and rest for scenario testing tomorrow. Our visit was short but I savored every second with him. It was worth it just to give him a hug and kiss and make him feel a tiny bit better. It was so hard to see him like that and I wish there was more I could do for him. I sent a letter to him on Monday but brought a little motivational one with me that I wrote for him to read before bed. Our letters and this blog are so helpful! The letters help motivate Kev, tell him how much I love him, and remind him of all the good things waiting for us when he is through. The blog releases emotions and helps us visualize how far we have come. Both keep us in sync and just a little more connected when times are tough and we can't talk as often as we wish we could. We just need to remind ourselves that this won't last forever.
In addition to PMA practice last night, they had advanced PMA testing. Kev missed two of the seven techniques and will have to remediate. Kev has been doing amazing so far, but these little losses really get to him. It is such a scary feeling to know that one more try at something can mean coming home. This is really our first time experiencing this feeling. It can be hard to keep his head above water at times, but Kev is giving everything he has got in him. We currently have two remediations to take - regular PMA test and two of the advanced PMA methods. I believe Kev has until the end of the month to retake them. It is certainly nerve wracking for us both and I know Kev is extremely stressed right now. They warned us that things can start to pile up at the academy and we are just starting to experience that now. Kev also told me that a cadet dislocated his shoulder when he was tased last week and because he wouldn't heal until July, they sent him home. That cadet will have to start all over from day 1 if he chooses to return. This really scared Kev - The thought of starting over from day one is something neither of us can imagine. We have come so far and intend to continue pushing. I believe in him and I know he will get us there. Sending all my good thoughts to Kev and his class during scenario testing this week.
I love you Kevvy! Good luck these next couple of days baby XO
"If you don't sacrifice for what you want, what you want becomes the sacrifice"- Keep pushing, I know you can do it. This time won't last forever <3
- Mimi
I can't even fathom that I am actually writing about day 100! It feels unreal! The new cadet class started on Monday and Kev said he watched how nervous they seemed and how timid they were to say hi to his class as they passed them in the halls. It must have felt like de ja vu. We both said that it feels like just yesterday that was him, nervous and unsure of what was to come. Kev is making sure to be kind to them, smile, and lead by example. Kev's first week at the academy, a senior told him to compact his water bottle in the chow hall before throwing it away - which he did and was promptly cringed at by a staff officer. Thankfully it was during orientation week when that happened so he didn't get yelled at. Kev knows the new cadets are no different than he was 3 months ago and some of them probably have a girlfriend or wife at home worried about this week and the next 6 months to come just like I was and am. In that case, I hope Kev's effort to give a friendly smile makes the difference in someone's day.
Kev had PMA practice for 4 hours on Tuesday morning, and then passed his pistol certification. His class received their riot helmets and had another lecture on use of force. Hearing that he received a riot helmet scared me a little. Another reminder of the dangers of the job and a little hard to get used to the idea hat Kev may actually have to use his gear one day. Kev and his class finally got to sit on the Senior side of the chow hall this week. We remember them pointing it out at orientation. Kev says it feels good and "the food tastes better when you sit over there." ;)
Some Tough Times & Scenario Testing -
The mood has significantly changed in Kev. These last couple of weeks have been some of the hardest so far, no doubt about it. Long days and nights, certifications, taser, gas, pepper spray, practice and testing have really began to wear him down. I could hear the exhaustion in his voice on the phone at night lately and see it on Facetime too. So, I drove up on Wednesday evening to surprise him during liberty. I even checked my texts from previous weeks to see what time Kev usually text me that he was done for the day and going out for dinner with the guys. I worked from home and made it up to the academy by 4:45 PM in order to beat traffic during rush hour. Kev isn't normally off on Wednesday around 5:30 - 6 PM, so I waited around and he finally text me at 5:30 saying he was in. I called him and told him I drove up to Sac! I knew he needed a hug this week and I was so happy to tell him I was here. He was so happy, thankful and surprised I came. He said the Sergeant wanted them to do PMA and it should only take an hour, then he would be off. I was so excited to see him! I went over to his little brother and sister in law's house to visit and see the baby while I killed time. They left to dinner and I shopped around for a bit waiting, but he didn't meet up until 8:30 PM:( He immediately vented and hugged me. My poor guy. Last night was the most stressed I have seen him. We went to dinner at Mikuni for about an hour and said our good bye so he could prepare and rest for scenario testing tomorrow. Our visit was short but I savored every second with him. It was worth it just to give him a hug and kiss and make him feel a tiny bit better. It was so hard to see him like that and I wish there was more I could do for him. I sent a letter to him on Monday but brought a little motivational one with me that I wrote for him to read before bed. Our letters and this blog are so helpful! The letters help motivate Kev, tell him how much I love him, and remind him of all the good things waiting for us when he is through. The blog releases emotions and helps us visualize how far we have come. Both keep us in sync and just a little more connected when times are tough and we can't talk as often as we wish we could. We just need to remind ourselves that this won't last forever.
In addition to PMA practice last night, they had advanced PMA testing. Kev missed two of the seven techniques and will have to remediate. Kev has been doing amazing so far, but these little losses really get to him. It is such a scary feeling to know that one more try at something can mean coming home. This is really our first time experiencing this feeling. It can be hard to keep his head above water at times, but Kev is giving everything he has got in him. We currently have two remediations to take - regular PMA test and two of the advanced PMA methods. I believe Kev has until the end of the month to retake them. It is certainly nerve wracking for us both and I know Kev is extremely stressed right now. They warned us that things can start to pile up at the academy and we are just starting to experience that now. Kev also told me that a cadet dislocated his shoulder when he was tased last week and because he wouldn't heal until July, they sent him home. That cadet will have to start all over from day 1 if he chooses to return. This really scared Kev - The thought of starting over from day one is something neither of us can imagine. We have come so far and intend to continue pushing. I believe in him and I know he will get us there. Sending all my good thoughts to Kev and his class during scenario testing this week.
I love you Kevvy! Good luck these next couple of days baby XO
"If you don't sacrifice for what you want, what you want becomes the sacrifice"- Keep pushing, I know you can do it. This time won't last forever <3
- Mimi
Tuesday, May 10, 2016
Day 99/194 - Week 15 & He Is A Senior!
Monday, Week 15!
I miss Kev so much this week because we were so busy this weekend that it felt like we didn't get anytime to enjoy each other one on one. When ever we get a lot of time together over the weekend, we are both really content and at ease during the week, but if we don't it can sometimes throw us off. The weekends depict a lot. We both had a stressful week and you could tell we weren't ourselves. Sometimes it takes a little downtime to unwind from a hard week and we just don't have that. So, I'm really looking forward to this weekend. We have no plans and just want to get away and enjoy our time together other. We are thinking of packing up and heading to the beach on Saturday with just the two of us. I can't wait.
Even though I am anxious for the weekend, I know Kev has a lot to get through this week. On Monday he had his shotgun certification and passed. He isn't new to shooting, so I think that may have been a comfortable test for him to pass. Although he has said that he is learning a lot more about guns at the academy that he didn't know. He also had Code 3 shotgun training and a night time shooting test yesterday that he really enjoyed. The night training is understandable, but because it has to be dark out it runs his days pretty late. He didn't get a chance to call me until almost 11 PM last night. I had gone to a Giants game with a couple girlfriends so I happened to be awake, but some nights I really try to wait up for him even when I'm tired. I wouldn't sleep well without hearing from him and we have talked every since the day I met him, so we both try to talk to each other if we can. Sometimes when the nights run late we cut it short though so that he can prepare for the next day and get some rest. The blue tooth really helps us because he can talk to me and shine his boots, brass, or make note cards. It really has been a savior!
He also had scenario practice yesterday and will the next couple of days before scenario testing on Thursday and Friday. If cadets don't pass at the end of the week, they were told the only remediation day is Saturday - all day. So he is going to work hard this week and pass for us! I know he can do it. Everyone at home will be sending him good thoughts.
It is clear the pace has significantly picked up and the testing is getting harder now and more involved. Testing is starting to combine hands on work with all areas of knowledge rather than a just a multiple choice test. The academy compresses the knowledge of a career in law enforcement into six months of training and success is vital. I know Kev can make it. Sending lots of love and good thoughts to West Sacramento this week and praying we get our day on the beach together.
- Mimi
I miss Kev so much this week because we were so busy this weekend that it felt like we didn't get anytime to enjoy each other one on one. When ever we get a lot of time together over the weekend, we are both really content and at ease during the week, but if we don't it can sometimes throw us off. The weekends depict a lot. We both had a stressful week and you could tell we weren't ourselves. Sometimes it takes a little downtime to unwind from a hard week and we just don't have that. So, I'm really looking forward to this weekend. We have no plans and just want to get away and enjoy our time together other. We are thinking of packing up and heading to the beach on Saturday with just the two of us. I can't wait.
Even though I am anxious for the weekend, I know Kev has a lot to get through this week. On Monday he had his shotgun certification and passed. He isn't new to shooting, so I think that may have been a comfortable test for him to pass. Although he has said that he is learning a lot more about guns at the academy that he didn't know. He also had Code 3 shotgun training and a night time shooting test yesterday that he really enjoyed. The night training is understandable, but because it has to be dark out it runs his days pretty late. He didn't get a chance to call me until almost 11 PM last night. I had gone to a Giants game with a couple girlfriends so I happened to be awake, but some nights I really try to wait up for him even when I'm tired. I wouldn't sleep well without hearing from him and we have talked every since the day I met him, so we both try to talk to each other if we can. Sometimes when the nights run late we cut it short though so that he can prepare for the next day and get some rest. The blue tooth really helps us because he can talk to me and shine his boots, brass, or make note cards. It really has been a savior!
He also had scenario practice yesterday and will the next couple of days before scenario testing on Thursday and Friday. If cadets don't pass at the end of the week, they were told the only remediation day is Saturday - all day. So he is going to work hard this week and pass for us! I know he can do it. Everyone at home will be sending him good thoughts.
It is clear the pace has significantly picked up and the testing is getting harder now and more involved. Testing is starting to combine hands on work with all areas of knowledge rather than a just a multiple choice test. The academy compresses the knowledge of a career in law enforcement into six months of training and success is vital. I know Kev can make it. Sending lots of love and good thoughts to West Sacramento this week and praying we get our day on the beach together.
- Mimi
Monday, May 9, 2016
Thoughts - 1/2 Way Through
I have never had such a mix of emotions like I have over these last three months and I definitely feel like the half way mark deserves it's own post. The California Highway Patrol Academy is quite a place, and your cadet's journey through it is very special. You truly learn to respect the Academy, and every officer who has graduated and earned themselves a badge. You realize that it takes a strong individual, both mentally and physically to succeed here. The same is expected from you as a partner in a relationship with your cadet, it is just as much a journey of your own. Kev and I had our own expectations of the academy when he first received his acceptance letter. A lot of things have been different than we expected, and that is because every story we read wasn't our own. I have grown to love Kev more than I ever thought possible, when I originally thought we would grow apart during this time. Instead I have watched him pursue his dream over the last three months. He has become physically and mentally stronger in so many ways. It's inspiring to watch him grow as he overcomes challenges, pushes himself, and absorbs the knowledge and lifestyle the Academy offers him. He is proud of himself and has found his place in this world. He is committing himself to a goal and believing in himself. That is the beauty of the academy. It is rare in this world to see that kind of strength and drive. To know that he belongs to you is even better.
Three months has felt like a long time. The half way mark is both an exciting milestone and a time to take a deep breathe and brace for a second round. While the strength you see in your cadet is inspiring, it also takes a lot of strength from you. Kev and I talk every day. There has not been a day since the academy started that I haven't had a night to talk with him. I love him and appreciate him for always making time for me in the midst of such a busy schedule. While I appreciate the time he makes for me, it is still limited. I can't text him or talk to him when something happens in my day until that night. Some days are manageable, while others like the day my grandma passed were hard and I felt a little alone. I have to learn to cope with life on my own and attempt to balance the stress of a hard day without interfering with Kev's focus on the Academy. Some days I am better at this than others. Kev says I get one day a month for a little break down. It can be hard constantly listening to stories about the academy during the week and then again on the weekend when people ask about it. I love hearing Kev's stories during the week and supporting him when he needs it. He has such long days and little sleep, that I love being an open ear for him to talk to and hearing all about his life at the academy. However, I can't help but want to escape it on the weekends. When we try to do normal things with friends, Kev is really tired and it's hard for him to let his mind fully escape what he has on his plate that week. I understand and most of our family understand, but friends don't fully get it. They don't understand the mental exhaustion of his life right now, how physically exhausted he is, or how focused he is and the affect it has on us both. His mind is elsewhere, and it is apparent. He looks different, acts different and thinks different but somehow manages to always be there for me however he can when I need him most. While we try to make time for friends, this may just be a summer we both give up for something much bigger and more important. It becomes more apparent that while we are together, the academy is our life right now. We just have to keep reminding ourselves that it is only a short time period of sacrifice in return for the fulfilling and rewarding career Kev has always wanted. Then our lives will be even better than before.
There is definitely a change of pace as you reach the half way mark at the academy. The attitude changes from fear of getting a gig or being yelled at with a smokey bear hat touching your forehead and spit hitting your face, to concern over workload and knowledge retention. It is a lot to accomplish in such a short time and the work has been piling on up until this point, and will continue to. It is a blend of fun and excitement, with the stress of being all you can be on a daily basis in order to succeed. There is no time for Kev to be tired or lose focus. His days are fast and calculated. Everything he does requires thought - how he walks, where he places his hands, how he addresses someone, his uniform, which shoe he put his PT towel in, the schedule of the day.. etc etc. That doesn't just turn off when he comes home for the weekend. He can dim it down to an extent, but you can tell he is home but not really. I would say month one at the academy was fear and stress accommodating to the rules, month two was excitement and getting into the flow of things, and month three was excitement and stress building. This second half of the academy we expect to continue to be exciting, fast and stressful. Scenario testing starts this week. Some scenarios Kev will only have a day or two to learn before he is tested. I believe in him and I know there is nothing he can't do. He has proven himself this far and I know we will make it.
This blog is meant to be a place to write down our story, let me sort out my thoughts, and let Kev read how I'm feeling. I actually haven't told many friends or family about it at all. It's just been for us. It has really helped me to write out how I feel along the way and listen closer to the details of his day. However, I truly hope it helps some of you reading too. The academy will make you both stronger. I look up to Kev more than ever, and feel like I chose a protective, loving, and motivated person to be my parter in life. I feel like Kev loves me more now too knowing that I am here to love and support him along the way. The hardest part of the academy for me is missing him at home. Even though Kev can feel stressed from the workload, he is making amazing friends and having the experience of a lifetime. We were even invited to another cadet's wedding. We have nick names names for different cadets he tells me about and a new kind of bond has formed between us because of the distance. We consider ourselves lucky to have this opportunity and are so excited for our future after graduation. Most nights we have some pretty good laughs but we have had nights too where I cry watching him head back there. I get anxious when I know he is testing, but it is exciting to get the call that he passed. It's a crazy mix of emotions for both of us. But every weekend that seems to fly by, we are another week closer to graduation. The last three months he has grown a lot. He is already a new man heading into the second half of the academy and I can't wait to see him tackle the new challenges that lie ahead.
Three months has felt like a long time. The half way mark is both an exciting milestone and a time to take a deep breathe and brace for a second round. While the strength you see in your cadet is inspiring, it also takes a lot of strength from you. Kev and I talk every day. There has not been a day since the academy started that I haven't had a night to talk with him. I love him and appreciate him for always making time for me in the midst of such a busy schedule. While I appreciate the time he makes for me, it is still limited. I can't text him or talk to him when something happens in my day until that night. Some days are manageable, while others like the day my grandma passed were hard and I felt a little alone. I have to learn to cope with life on my own and attempt to balance the stress of a hard day without interfering with Kev's focus on the Academy. Some days I am better at this than others. Kev says I get one day a month for a little break down. It can be hard constantly listening to stories about the academy during the week and then again on the weekend when people ask about it. I love hearing Kev's stories during the week and supporting him when he needs it. He has such long days and little sleep, that I love being an open ear for him to talk to and hearing all about his life at the academy. However, I can't help but want to escape it on the weekends. When we try to do normal things with friends, Kev is really tired and it's hard for him to let his mind fully escape what he has on his plate that week. I understand and most of our family understand, but friends don't fully get it. They don't understand the mental exhaustion of his life right now, how physically exhausted he is, or how focused he is and the affect it has on us both. His mind is elsewhere, and it is apparent. He looks different, acts different and thinks different but somehow manages to always be there for me however he can when I need him most. While we try to make time for friends, this may just be a summer we both give up for something much bigger and more important. It becomes more apparent that while we are together, the academy is our life right now. We just have to keep reminding ourselves that it is only a short time period of sacrifice in return for the fulfilling and rewarding career Kev has always wanted. Then our lives will be even better than before.
There is definitely a change of pace as you reach the half way mark at the academy. The attitude changes from fear of getting a gig or being yelled at with a smokey bear hat touching your forehead and spit hitting your face, to concern over workload and knowledge retention. It is a lot to accomplish in such a short time and the work has been piling on up until this point, and will continue to. It is a blend of fun and excitement, with the stress of being all you can be on a daily basis in order to succeed. There is no time for Kev to be tired or lose focus. His days are fast and calculated. Everything he does requires thought - how he walks, where he places his hands, how he addresses someone, his uniform, which shoe he put his PT towel in, the schedule of the day.. etc etc. That doesn't just turn off when he comes home for the weekend. He can dim it down to an extent, but you can tell he is home but not really. I would say month one at the academy was fear and stress accommodating to the rules, month two was excitement and getting into the flow of things, and month three was excitement and stress building. This second half of the academy we expect to continue to be exciting, fast and stressful. Scenario testing starts this week. Some scenarios Kev will only have a day or two to learn before he is tested. I believe in him and I know there is nothing he can't do. He has proven himself this far and I know we will make it.
This blog is meant to be a place to write down our story, let me sort out my thoughts, and let Kev read how I'm feeling. I actually haven't told many friends or family about it at all. It's just been for us. It has really helped me to write out how I feel along the way and listen closer to the details of his day. However, I truly hope it helps some of you reading too. The academy will make you both stronger. I look up to Kev more than ever, and feel like I chose a protective, loving, and motivated person to be my parter in life. I feel like Kev loves me more now too knowing that I am here to love and support him along the way. The hardest part of the academy for me is missing him at home. Even though Kev can feel stressed from the workload, he is making amazing friends and having the experience of a lifetime. We were even invited to another cadet's wedding. We have nick names names for different cadets he tells me about and a new kind of bond has formed between us because of the distance. We consider ourselves lucky to have this opportunity and are so excited for our future after graduation. Most nights we have some pretty good laughs but we have had nights too where I cry watching him head back there. I get anxious when I know he is testing, but it is exciting to get the call that he passed. It's a crazy mix of emotions for both of us. But every weekend that seems to fly by, we are another week closer to graduation. The last three months he has grown a lot. He is already a new man heading into the second half of the academy and I can't wait to see him tackle the new challenges that lie ahead.
Day 95-98/194 - OC Pepper Spray
Thursday & Sunday, Week 14!
Last week was likely the craziest week Kev has had at the academy so far. Thursday was mostly scenario practice and anticipation for OC on Friday morning. I suppose I will say that if you are going to focus your worries on one of the events of this week, focus on the OC pepper spray. Kev sent me a picture of his face when he got back to the room - his eyes and face were bright red. I do sort of feel like it is a right of passage though, so I will save most of his stories of the week for just us. Although, I will say that I am so proud of how strong he was this week. He accepted and overcame the challenge of late nights and physical exhaustion - push ups aren't off limits just because OC is in your eyes. The purpose of this week wasn't only so that you know when to use certain force, but so that you know the reaction you will have to each method of force in the event that it happens to be taken from you and used on you, you can keep fighting. There are a lot of other underlying reasons, but in the end Kev has a full understanding of why the academy has this week and he made it through. We talked a lot last week about keeping his head up and staying strong. He did, and I am so proud of him!
Friday also meant room inspections. Kev said they found a lot of hidden food which was their biggest concern. One cadet had M&Ms hidden in anAspirin bottle and they found another with a backpack full of chips and candy! The junk was dumped in the front of the classroom and the cadets were given a lecture on integrity. Kev said gigs will likely be posted soon. We talked about how long the academy has been around and that all secret hiding spots in those small rooms have been found and passed down from staff officer to staff officer. Just wait out the six months before snacking out in your bed.
Friday was the end of week 14, and we are officially half way done with the academy! We aren't counting graduation week, since that will be such an exciting week for us. After a long day, Kev also moved his belongings into his new dorm room on the senior side before coming home. The new cadet class will arrive on Monday and Kev will now be the one with the knowledge of what lies on the road ahead of them. I feel like we have come such a long way, and yet there is still so far to go. We had a little fun this weekend, but it was hard to shake off the week and we had a lot of other commitments. I just hang on to those little moments when we get to lay, do nothing, and cuddle.
-Mimi
Last week was likely the craziest week Kev has had at the academy so far. Thursday was mostly scenario practice and anticipation for OC on Friday morning. I suppose I will say that if you are going to focus your worries on one of the events of this week, focus on the OC pepper spray. Kev sent me a picture of his face when he got back to the room - his eyes and face were bright red. I do sort of feel like it is a right of passage though, so I will save most of his stories of the week for just us. Although, I will say that I am so proud of how strong he was this week. He accepted and overcame the challenge of late nights and physical exhaustion - push ups aren't off limits just because OC is in your eyes. The purpose of this week wasn't only so that you know when to use certain force, but so that you know the reaction you will have to each method of force in the event that it happens to be taken from you and used on you, you can keep fighting. There are a lot of other underlying reasons, but in the end Kev has a full understanding of why the academy has this week and he made it through. We talked a lot last week about keeping his head up and staying strong. He did, and I am so proud of him!
Friday also meant room inspections. Kev said they found a lot of hidden food which was their biggest concern. One cadet had M&Ms hidden in anAspirin bottle and they found another with a backpack full of chips and candy! The junk was dumped in the front of the classroom and the cadets were given a lecture on integrity. Kev said gigs will likely be posted soon. We talked about how long the academy has been around and that all secret hiding spots in those small rooms have been found and passed down from staff officer to staff officer. Just wait out the six months before snacking out in your bed.
Friday was the end of week 14, and we are officially half way done with the academy! We aren't counting graduation week, since that will be such an exciting week for us. After a long day, Kev also moved his belongings into his new dorm room on the senior side before coming home. The new cadet class will arrive on Monday and Kev will now be the one with the knowledge of what lies on the road ahead of them. I feel like we have come such a long way, and yet there is still so far to go. We had a little fun this weekend, but it was hard to shake off the week and we had a lot of other commitments. I just hang on to those little moments when we get to lay, do nothing, and cuddle.
-Mimi
Thursday, May 5, 2016
Day 94/194 - Taser
Wednesday, Week 14!
Wednesday started with early morning PT and a surprise gig line. Staff officers DID check guns and mags as expected, and Kev passed. Cleaning them the other night after range paid off! He did not get gigged. The rest of the morning was a lecture on how the taser guns work and what they do to the body. Then it was finally time to go out and give them a feel :)
Kev wasn't too concerned about being gassed on Sunday and almost seemed excited and anxious leading up to the taser yesterday. He is definitely most uncomfortable with the idea of being pepper sprayed on Friday. However, it sounds like his mind changed about the taser when he said it was the worst 5 seconds he had experienced. He said a few of the ex-military cadets barely made a sound, some of the girls cried out, and he mimicked the loud"ughhahhhhh" sound he made. He said one girl yelled, "Fuuuuuuu...ouchhhh". That made me laugh ;) She and every one else are so brave! It sounds like it was a rough day. Kev said he went towards the end so he saw all the different reactions leading up to his turn. There were a few different ways you could be tased, so everyone had a different reaction depending on which way they took it and which voltage. One guy elected to do the barbs with the highest voltage and received a commendable (opposite of a gig). After all the tasing out on the field, Kev said he actually felt good later that night - as in his body felt loose and relaxed. He said staff said it might make them feel better after and Kev said he thought it actually did.
After being tased, the cadets went over use of force policies. Kev says that he definitely understands why the Academy feels that each Officer-To-Be should experience the different enforcement tactics for themselves - gas, taser, and pepper spay. He said it definitely gives you a better understanding of how it feels and how the body reacts so you can make the appropriate decision out in the field. After being tased, Kev said he now knows how it feels and wouldn't want someone else to have to experience that unless absolutely necessary.
This has certainly been an exciting week for stories. We finally had a good amount of time to chat last night after Kev had liberty. He was off around 6 PM and went to a sit down dinner with another cadet. He said they ordered steaks and loved being served during the week! He called me after and it was so nice to talk to him and really catch up. With late nights and the last two weekends cut short, I really miss him. He is my best friend. When our time and calls are consistent, I am really comfortable with the Academy. However, when the schedule switches up and our time together is cut short it can be a little tough. I originally thought Friday through Sunday night wasn't enough, and now after losing two Sundays in a row I can't wait for a full weekend with him! I can only imagine how some of the families who live down South feel. They probably haven't been able to see their cadet for a a few weeks now. Kev and I are so lucky we only live an hour from the Academy, so I am thankful for that.
Only one more night of sleeping alone until the man of my dreams is home for the weekend! And this Saturday is our anniversary :) I miss him so much and can't wait to open my front door and see his handsome face standing behind it.
- Mimi
Wednesday started with early morning PT and a surprise gig line. Staff officers DID check guns and mags as expected, and Kev passed. Cleaning them the other night after range paid off! He did not get gigged. The rest of the morning was a lecture on how the taser guns work and what they do to the body. Then it was finally time to go out and give them a feel :)
Kev wasn't too concerned about being gassed on Sunday and almost seemed excited and anxious leading up to the taser yesterday. He is definitely most uncomfortable with the idea of being pepper sprayed on Friday. However, it sounds like his mind changed about the taser when he said it was the worst 5 seconds he had experienced. He said a few of the ex-military cadets barely made a sound, some of the girls cried out, and he mimicked the loud"ughhahhhhh" sound he made. He said one girl yelled, "Fuuuuuuu...ouchhhh". That made me laugh ;) She and every one else are so brave! It sounds like it was a rough day. Kev said he went towards the end so he saw all the different reactions leading up to his turn. There were a few different ways you could be tased, so everyone had a different reaction depending on which way they took it and which voltage. One guy elected to do the barbs with the highest voltage and received a commendable (opposite of a gig). After all the tasing out on the field, Kev said he actually felt good later that night - as in his body felt loose and relaxed. He said staff said it might make them feel better after and Kev said he thought it actually did.
After being tased, the cadets went over use of force policies. Kev says that he definitely understands why the Academy feels that each Officer-To-Be should experience the different enforcement tactics for themselves - gas, taser, and pepper spay. He said it definitely gives you a better understanding of how it feels and how the body reacts so you can make the appropriate decision out in the field. After being tased, Kev said he now knows how it feels and wouldn't want someone else to have to experience that unless absolutely necessary.
This has certainly been an exciting week for stories. We finally had a good amount of time to chat last night after Kev had liberty. He was off around 6 PM and went to a sit down dinner with another cadet. He said they ordered steaks and loved being served during the week! He called me after and it was so nice to talk to him and really catch up. With late nights and the last two weekends cut short, I really miss him. He is my best friend. When our time and calls are consistent, I am really comfortable with the Academy. However, when the schedule switches up and our time together is cut short it can be a little tough. I originally thought Friday through Sunday night wasn't enough, and now after losing two Sundays in a row I can't wait for a full weekend with him! I can only imagine how some of the families who live down South feel. They probably haven't been able to see their cadet for a a few weeks now. Kev and I are so lucky we only live an hour from the Academy, so I am thankful for that.
Only one more night of sleeping alone until the man of my dreams is home for the weekend! And this Saturday is our anniversary :) I miss him so much and can't wait to open my front door and see his handsome face standing behind it.
- Mimi
Wednesday, May 4, 2016
Day 92-93/104 - Start of Week 14!
Monday & Tuesday, Week 14!
Our week has been really busy for us both! Kev is doing practice scenarios and having pretty late nights, while it is closing week for me at work. Sometimes busy is good though and makes the time go faster. I always miss him, but when we are both swamped the days seem to be over and I am in bed on the phone with him before I know it.
Kev's Monday started with PT early in the morning and included a few new exercises followed by a run. The rest of the day, they practiced scenarios. It seems every day is a different type of scenario so far this week. Kev really enjoys this kind of learning because it is so interactive.
Tuesday began with PMA practice early in the morning and then the cadets practiced how to march out for the Fallen Officer Memorial that was scheduled from about 8 AM - 12 PM that day. Kev said the memorial was very beautiful but of course solemn. Whenever there is a memorial around the fountain it seems to really touch him. He said the Governor, Commissioner, Sergeant and others all spoke. They read off all 252 names and also added Officer Taylor's name to the fountain. It seems more real knowing his name is on the fountain now. I remember being excited to see the fountain with Kev on Orientation Day, and now I know Kev and I both have a lot more respect for it. We understand its meaning, respect the heroes whose names are on it, and pray to never know its heartache.
I didn't hear from Kev until after 10 PM each night this week. Last night, they practiced night shooting. It doesn't get dark until around 8 PM now, so it was a long day and night. Kev said night range was fun and exciting even though it meant a late night. After range, everyone was sure to clean their guns especially after the surprise gun inspection last week. We chatted for a bit while he was cleaning but it's always hard to talk on the phone when the guys are cleaning their guns, it can be pretty loud. I think he was a little wired after range too because he couldn't get to sleep. It makes sense that it might take some time to wind down after shooting for a couple hours. For some reason I couldn't sleep either, so we were both up at 1 AM sending a couple texts to each other. Unfortunately, sleepless nights catch up with you at the Academy. He had to be up around 4:30 AM this morning (Wednesday) for a full perimeter run after only 3 hours of sleep. My poor guy. I respect him so much for his perseverance at the Academy. I love him more and more everyday.
-Mimi
Our week has been really busy for us both! Kev is doing practice scenarios and having pretty late nights, while it is closing week for me at work. Sometimes busy is good though and makes the time go faster. I always miss him, but when we are both swamped the days seem to be over and I am in bed on the phone with him before I know it.
Kev's Monday started with PT early in the morning and included a few new exercises followed by a run. The rest of the day, they practiced scenarios. It seems every day is a different type of scenario so far this week. Kev really enjoys this kind of learning because it is so interactive.
Tuesday began with PMA practice early in the morning and then the cadets practiced how to march out for the Fallen Officer Memorial that was scheduled from about 8 AM - 12 PM that day. Kev said the memorial was very beautiful but of course solemn. Whenever there is a memorial around the fountain it seems to really touch him. He said the Governor, Commissioner, Sergeant and others all spoke. They read off all 252 names and also added Officer Taylor's name to the fountain. It seems more real knowing his name is on the fountain now. I remember being excited to see the fountain with Kev on Orientation Day, and now I know Kev and I both have a lot more respect for it. We understand its meaning, respect the heroes whose names are on it, and pray to never know its heartache.
I didn't hear from Kev until after 10 PM each night this week. Last night, they practiced night shooting. It doesn't get dark until around 8 PM now, so it was a long day and night. Kev said night range was fun and exciting even though it meant a late night. After range, everyone was sure to clean their guns especially after the surprise gun inspection last week. We chatted for a bit while he was cleaning but it's always hard to talk on the phone when the guys are cleaning their guns, it can be pretty loud. I think he was a little wired after range too because he couldn't get to sleep. It makes sense that it might take some time to wind down after shooting for a couple hours. For some reason I couldn't sleep either, so we were both up at 1 AM sending a couple texts to each other. Unfortunately, sleepless nights catch up with you at the Academy. He had to be up around 4:30 AM this morning (Wednesday) for a full perimeter run after only 3 hours of sleep. My poor guy. I respect him so much for his perseverance at the Academy. I love him more and more everyday.
-Mimi
Monday, May 2, 2016
Day 89-91/194 - Tear Gas
Friday - Sunday, Week 13!
Friday was Senior graduation day! Even typing that gives me a little adrenaline and excitement! Kev said everyone was in a great mood and like our experience on Orientation Day it was his turn to greet guests with "Good Morning Maam" or "Good Morning Sir". This day gave us both a little added drive and excitement for what lies ahead!
Kev said his class had started addressing the Seniors as "Sir" or "Maam" instead of "Cadet" just a few days earlier than when they received their badges and became Officers. Kev said you could see the appreciation on their faces. He said he and his classmates know how hard it is and what it takes to get to where they are, and they deserve the respect. It was a mutual understanding between both classes.
When Kev got home on Friday night he treated me to a nice dinner with just the two of us and we spent the rest of the night just enjoying each other's company. In the morning, we packed up and headed back up to Sacramento for my friend's wedding. We had such a nice evening, but it felt like the night was over before we knew it and Kev was running out the door to make it back to the academy by 12 PM for tear gas.
Kev and the cadets were gassed around 1 PM and he text me around 3 PM saying he would call me soon. Now that the new Junior class is about to come in, Kev says staff keeps telling them to not share too much so that they can experience things for the first time. In that case, maybe I'll be a little vague in what he told me about Sunday. However, he was fine! He said it was unpleasant and felt longer than it actually was - everyone's noses were a little runny and it was hard to breathe for a few minutes afterwards. He said his skin felt a hot and tingly but all in all, he was okay not long after and into the night. He washed those clothes separately at the academy rather than mixing them with his other laundry and bringing them home. Ultimately, our goal for him was to be a leader. Not to break or lose his composure when he heard others coughing or struggling. He didn't and said he did really well. Next up is the taser on Wednesday and pepper spray on Friday. I had those days mixed up originally. At least I'll be able to take care of him Friday night. Kev is not looking forward to the pepper spray, but almost seems excited for the taser. He can't even take eye drops without panicking, so Friday should be entertaining for all ;) He hates things near his eyes!
Kev warned me on Sunday that he may have late nights this week. His class is the only one on campus now and they are practicing for scenario testing to start next week. I like when he gives me a little warning so I know not to wait for his call. I really want him to practice and push hard this week in preparation for scenarios. Kev is amazing, so even though I should worry about him I never do. I trust him and believe in him, which helps me so much while he is at the academy. I rarely worry about him, which is nice so that I can be supportive and motivating in other ways. He just got his new ranking on Sunday too and moved up a few more spots in his class. I am so proud of him everyday!
- Mimi
Friday was Senior graduation day! Even typing that gives me a little adrenaline and excitement! Kev said everyone was in a great mood and like our experience on Orientation Day it was his turn to greet guests with "Good Morning Maam" or "Good Morning Sir". This day gave us both a little added drive and excitement for what lies ahead!
Kev said his class had started addressing the Seniors as "Sir" or "Maam" instead of "Cadet" just a few days earlier than when they received their badges and became Officers. Kev said you could see the appreciation on their faces. He said he and his classmates know how hard it is and what it takes to get to where they are, and they deserve the respect. It was a mutual understanding between both classes.
When Kev got home on Friday night he treated me to a nice dinner with just the two of us and we spent the rest of the night just enjoying each other's company. In the morning, we packed up and headed back up to Sacramento for my friend's wedding. We had such a nice evening, but it felt like the night was over before we knew it and Kev was running out the door to make it back to the academy by 12 PM for tear gas.
Kev and the cadets were gassed around 1 PM and he text me around 3 PM saying he would call me soon. Now that the new Junior class is about to come in, Kev says staff keeps telling them to not share too much so that they can experience things for the first time. In that case, maybe I'll be a little vague in what he told me about Sunday. However, he was fine! He said it was unpleasant and felt longer than it actually was - everyone's noses were a little runny and it was hard to breathe for a few minutes afterwards. He said his skin felt a hot and tingly but all in all, he was okay not long after and into the night. He washed those clothes separately at the academy rather than mixing them with his other laundry and bringing them home. Ultimately, our goal for him was to be a leader. Not to break or lose his composure when he heard others coughing or struggling. He didn't and said he did really well. Next up is the taser on Wednesday and pepper spray on Friday. I had those days mixed up originally. At least I'll be able to take care of him Friday night. Kev is not looking forward to the pepper spray, but almost seems excited for the taser. He can't even take eye drops without panicking, so Friday should be entertaining for all ;) He hates things near his eyes!
Kev warned me on Sunday that he may have late nights this week. His class is the only one on campus now and they are practicing for scenario testing to start next week. I like when he gives me a little warning so I know not to wait for his call. I really want him to practice and push hard this week in preparation for scenarios. Kev is amazing, so even though I should worry about him I never do. I trust him and believe in him, which helps me so much while he is at the academy. I rarely worry about him, which is nice so that I can be supportive and motivating in other ways. He just got his new ranking on Sunday too and moved up a few more spots in his class. I am so proud of him everyday!
- Mimi
Congratulations to CTC 3-15!
You worked hard and you earned it. Be all you can be and we hope to see you out there soon!
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